Representing America - American Literature AP - Blog

Reflection On Poetry

At the beginning of the poetry unit, I kind of knew what poetry was and how it was used to show different emotions and things like that. I still remember when Mr. kahn came to my class freshman year and that is when I knew little about poetry. He taught me the basic structure of poetry and how all the basic function of language blends in with the style of poetry. Also he taught use how to use striking lines to incorporate more feeling with the poetry. When Mr. Kahn first started to teach us about poetry I was not interested at all because I really did not care much about it. Then as the unit began to progress I started to respect and understand poetry better. As we began to write poetry I got more interested in it. I could relate to poetry more because i am putting in my own experiences in it. I have only been to a few spoken word cases but the ones I have been to have been amazing. I love the way they change the tone within the poetry and how it really expresses the feeling within the poem.

    MacNolia. What can I say it was a really good book but before I even talk about the book I want to get at the structure of it. The way that the poems are arranged is a great way to create the plot and conflict within the book. All of the poems in the book create an all around theme that portrays the main character and his life. He creates a feeling that every poem gets at. I really like elegy to my son because it shows a lot of emotion within MacNolia. It also portrays her emotion without her ever saying them. I learned a lot of from our poetry unit and MacNolia.   

 

Silver Me

One of my favorite poems that we've discussed so far is "Mirror" by Sylvia Plath. In fact, it inspired me to write my own poem about mirrors. What's ironic is that in Biology, we were discussing how we only see about 15% of the entire electromagnetic spectrum, and then the conversation took a confusing turn and soon we were all asking questions like "What if we could see radio waves?" or "What color is a mirror?" and the whole room got very poetic and life-pondering. Anyway, I'd love it if you guys looked it over and gave me feedback!

 

Silver Me

What color is a mirror?

Is it the me I always see?

Is it another place that's inside out? Or upside down?

That silver, shiny piece of wall watches me sleep, eat, breathe, see.

So I begin to materialize in my mind

Who she's become. 

Another me, yet more predictable. A copy.

I see her smile. The noun and the verb. Forced and happy.

She's empty, like a dead vessel floating along without destination.

Most days she's a calm sea breeze on a warm sunny day. 

A happy dream.

But sometimes, sleep is uneasy.

She thunders in, anger bright as lightening. Pouring tears.

Dark streams fall from her cloudy sky of eyes.

A foreign place of a face. 

Her blue eyes pierce the glass, radiating hate.

She's a shaking storm of violence,

That girl I see.

I hate her.

That silver me.

 

Elegy to Papa

2000.  Your eyes match the waves. You observe your grandchildren running through the water, giggling as if you are recalling your own childhood. Reaching down, you throw my tiny body onto you're jolly pot belly cushion. "Welcome back kiddo."

2008. Dad holds you're naked body in the bathroom, he makes sure you pee inside the toilet this time. Like a father, he aims you. He recalls his own childhood. You stop fighting him off. Your aged mind has completely surrendered to infancy. I stand in the hallway, hypnotized by the brown excrement carpet stains Nana struggles to clean. It smells like a dirty diaper. Her eyes, distressed, like a mothers'. We hear you crying from the hallway.

2005. My hands are purple from the red and blue washable markers I determinedly color my hair with. I look like a grown-up now. The phone rings. Mommy and daddy pack bags. They say they will be be back tomorrow. "Don't worry Zoe, you'll spend the day with Lea, have a fun Fourth of July!" I overhear her talking to daddy, "People can re- learn to speak, stephen. Strokes are common."

2003. You're pine scented office is like a treasure box through my creative eyes. I run my tiny fingers through your golden dusty book stacks. A young picture of you catches my eye. "President of the Illinois Power Plant" labels twist  imagination as "make believe" transforms me into you. I sit firmly on my green velvet chair and slide my name tag closer to me. "WENDEL J KELLEY," imprinted in rusty gold. This must be what its like to be a grownup.

2006. You pout sourly in your smelly recliner chair. "My ice-cream!" Is what you sternly command Clark to retrieve. Us three know thats not what you really mean. I see the frustration in your caged eyes. "My ice-cream!" you scream in clarks ghost white face. Clark hands you your glasses. His eyes are red.

2009. I stare at your weak sedated body on the nursing home casket. You look like a newborn child. Your bruised eye is now red like the now diminished temper that had gotten you into this mess.  Dads sunken eyes resemble yours as he paces angrily back and forth. "Black eyes don't come from falling out of chairs."

Lost Count: A Love Story

Since eighth grade I have always had nights every so often when I just get into a youtube craze of watching poets performing. Some of my favorites are from something called "Brave New Voices". There are a lot of different poets performing in competitons and they're the type of poems that I can watch over and over again to an extent where I know every word and their exact tone but I will still hear something different than I ever have before. Another poet who captivates me is named Jeanann Verlee. From these two poets/groups some of my favorites are "Thinking about you", "40 love letters", "Hir", "That girl", "Unsolicited Advice to Adolescent Girls with Crooked Teeth and Pink Hair" and many others. 

One of my favorites is poem called "Lost Count: A Love Story". This poem is two eighteen year old boys talking about the unsafe area they live in and how many of their friends they have had to see murdered. The lines in this poem can catch you completely off guard with how brutally honest they are about the dangerous neighborhood they live in. They write this poem in an attempt to be able to make more people aware of the unsafe lifestyle so many are forced to face, which is similar to MacNolia competeting in the spelling me. MacNolia and these boys both want to prove that they deserve better than what they are surrounded with and that they should not be defined by their race or the area they grow up in.

Distracting Flesh

I have to admit I was surprised that in class we did not spend much time on the poem "John Montiere answer to question one" in MacNolia. I find it to be a particularly powerful and and insightful glimpse into John's mind, especially pertaining to his view of MacNolia. The first stanza of the poem is heartbreaking, in a sense, because John has realized a change in MacNolia's character. He believes that she has become so hardened and defeated that it causes him pain to look in to her eyes and see himself. At first I thought, maybe his lust for MacNolia has worn off after he's had time to process her imperfections and baggage, and maybe now their love will become more realistic, but also stronger. However, the because John cannot even bear to look into her eyes and see himself, and cannot even find any beauty in his altered view of her, it seems that this poem suggests a significant blow to their relationship, one that might be fatal. The order and juxtaposition in which this story is unraveled add to its emotional power. For instance, the poem just before this one, "inchoate", told from MacNolia's point of view, suggests that her feelings toward John and their relationship may be at least as negative as his. She likens intimacy with him as with a ghost of someone who "taught you how not to love", and even describes the start of their relationship as if John snatched her up before she could consider her true feelings. 

John has relied on physical intimacy with MacNolia to be his primary display of love and affection, but I believe that MacNolia will not feel truly loved unles or until they also begin to express their love through verbal communication. To me, the last stanza of the poem is such an honest revelation into John's character, and acts as his sort of defense as to why he is truly afraid to step out of his comfort zone. 

If I would look into her eyes, it was as if fingers would strip off

my clothes, and I would want to strip off my skin, but I'd fear it

would not help my fear; it may only lead to my bones, without

the distraction of my flesh to comfort me. 

John relies on MacNolia's physical attraction to his "flesh" to distract her from one he seems to believe are his shortcomings, or, in other words, he fears that MacNolia will begin to see him in a more negative light, just as he has come to view her. This may seem irrelevant, but to me I read the first stanza as almost sexist, because he has come to discover her complications and complex personality as less attractive and not womanly, or at least not womanly in an appealing way. He says that "she had a shy smile, but she laughed like a man". Although this may be sexist, (but not at all surprising, coming from that time), he is so critical of himself, and has so little self confidence in anything other than the appearance of his physical body, that I am more inclined to view this poem as a heartbreaking, vulnerable insight into John's fears than an attack on MacNolia.

 

 

 

John is Really Trying

I think that so far MacNolia is a very interesting book. I find it really intriguing to read because of the fact that it tells the whole story of the book through poems. Some of the poems in the book have significantly stood out to me. One of those poems is I'm Trying. Even though it is not a very long poem, it has a lot to say. 

The speaker of the poem is John, and I think basically what he is trying to say is that he is trying to change so that he can open up to MacNolia and be truthful with her. The tone of the poem is very sincere and serious. I think that the first stanza is talking about hoe he wants to tell her about his faults but he doesn't know how to do that without the fear of hurting her. He says, "To blind you to my sins,/ I'm trying to unbutton my shirt/ To let the light pour out." He is saying that he wants to open himself up to her but he wants to shield her from the mistakes he has made. He also refers to the fears inside of him. He is trying to open up to her and tell her all of his mistakes, he just doesn't know how. I think that his fear is that if he opens up to her, he might lose her. 

In the second stanza, he basically is saying that he realizes he needs to man up and live up to his mistakes because he is taking on new responsibilities with his new child. His tone changes and becomes more confident and strong. He says " I'm trying to apologize for my life/ Before I met you and my father's example." He wants to live up to his mistakes, because his father didn't, and that made his childhood bad. Back in the poem John Montiere answer to question two, he says that his father said "I said I'm not drunk". His father never lived up to his mistakes which didn't give him a good childhood, and now that he has a child with MacNolia, he wants to become more responsible so his child has a better life. He is trying to change for MacNolia, their child, and himself. 

The third stanza basically says that he doesn't want to make up any more excuses. He is trying to find a way to say that he needs her. "It's your voice, your voice, your voice." When he says this, I think he is saying that MacNolia is the only one who can help him, or the only one he wants help from. He is saying it's you, you're the only one. The last stanza was a little difficult for me to interpret. I think that he is saying that even though he lies, she does too, and that they need to handle their life with more care now. When he says, "I'm trying to be the stone/ You wield to slay the giant or/ To skip across a pond.", he is saying that I'm trying to fix this problem that we have. You can wield me to slay this giant problem, or we can throw it away and skip it across the pond and forget about it. We can either overcome this problem or forget about it. 

Please feel free to comment on how you interpreted this poem.   

Respecting Black History Month

As we all know, Black History Month is coming up, and I have decided to take a closer look into MacNolia’s piece “In Service.”  I would really like to understand/appreciate the bigger meaning of the poem.(so if you have anything to say go ahead and share.)  

The setting is in Akron, Ohio, 1948, in Dr. Wittenberg’s  POV.

When looking at the time period, blacks were discriminated against and considered inferior. From being forced to America in the 15^thcentury to the civil rights movements, abolishing discrimination was a huge struggle for African Americans. I believe MacNolia set this poem during this time period for a reason. This was an era of terror for the black race. Even though discrimination was rough, some good things did happen, like Jackie Robinson being the first African American in the MLB. (Etc)

Wittenberg’s tone in this poem just illustrates how mocking and petty whites treated blacks back then.

“Come over next week and bring                                   

Some laundry—we’ll show you what                                    

She can do. She can spell

Any word you can pretty much

Think of: although—at least,

I’m not sure—I don’t believe

She knows what they all mean.”

 

MacNolia enforces a blatant mocking/ ironic tone here to show how poorly she was treated as a human being while working for these people. She has Dr. Wittenberg talking to us as if he was talking to another benevolent man about her, which seems to be bragging; however, to me comes off really as insolent and mocking towards her abilities. This poem represents a lot about the black’s situation during this time period.

Passing of the Baton

We were not assigned to read the poem "Jesse Owens, 1963," but I thought I would look at it anyway because I admire Jesse Owens and what he was able to accomplish in his career. In the poem, John compares life to a relay race, and writes how the passing of the baton is analogous with the passing down of wisdom after living through a life. I used to run on a relay team so I can relate to the last couple of lines especially. The moment just before the exchange can be intimidating, because you notice how exhausted your teammate is but also realize that you now have to accomplish what he just finished, faster if possible. It is a daunting task. When receiving life lessons from a person who has already experienced most of what they ever will, you may feel similar emotions because you know they are basically done, and you now have to go through the debilitating process that brought them to the position they are currently in.

Jesse Owens was a hero, but he wasn't treated as such after all of his endorsement deals were made public. He had lost his status of an amateur, and with it the respect of many people. In 1963, the year John met Owens, the sprinter was not recognized as the legend he is today and "looked like a man at the end of a long race." He was working at a gas station struggling just to get by. Owens' state shocked John a little, telling him that no matter who you are, life still has the same effect on you.

Ourselves in Our Bodies

One poem I really like from MACNOLIA by A. Van Jordan was "John Montiere answer to question one", which went along a common theme of how drugs can change people. In this instance, the drug was alcohol. He discusses how when MacNolia started to drink she became far more depressed and defeated, saying "Her eyes no longer looked like the dark wells I would fall into when we first met; her eyes were bottomless pits filled with sadness, dark holes I feared." What I found interesting about this line is that eyes are generally seen as windows to a person's soul. Not only does it give us some insight into MacNolia's character, but it also shows us more about John's relationship with and feelings about her.

My absolute favorite part of of the poem is, "it may only lead to my bones, without the distraction of my flesh to comfort me." Bones are commonly used in expressions such as "bare bones" that mean the absolute essence, of something or one's self. I thought it was interesting that he did not want to get to know the possible essence of his being, but instead would rather stay acquainted with the more superficial aspects of his person.

Love Is Her Drug

 Almost as cliche as the title of this post is, so is Mac and Johns relationship. They have the classic marriage and "love" I have witnessed so many times not only on tv but in real life too. Johns clear intents are Mac's "goodies" and he cheats on her and doesn't treat her the way she should. And the word love has learned Mac into thinking its definiton is her relationship with John, but she has yet to learn the true definiton of it, if there is infact one. This cliche of love has been spread all over our modern world. For example, a couple that holds this would be Rihanna and Chris Brown. Just a couple years ago, as every one knows, Rihanna took a very bad beating from Chris Brown, and it was all over the media. But only a couple of months after this event they have been back together, and currently are back together at this moment. Chris Brown is also currently in a realtionship with another girl, who is not Rihanna, and she is aware of this, but she still continues her romantic relationship with him because she claims she loves him. If love means getting hurt over and over by the person who means the most to you and you trust the most and constantly getting cheated on and lied to I, for one, want absolutely nothing to do with it. As said in the poem Infedelity "sometimes you learn words by living them and sometimes words learn you by defining who you are", Mac, John, Rihanna, and Chris all have yet to learn this word and all of their relationships are a sick joke. But not the kind of joke you laugh at, but the kind of joke where someone ends up hurt in the end.

As Refreshing As Spring

Even though we spent some time on the poem "with" in MacNolia, there is one line I especially love that we only mentioned briefly.  I not only love the image that it captures, but I also love how you can almost feel the way MacNolia's heart swells with love from the gentle sight of the two most important men in her life crying.  To complete the cycle of her pregnancy, the last definition of "with" is, "11. given, granted: With his blessing, we baptized our son, and they both cried, both like grown men, for a man never changes the way he cries, always as if he were the coming of spring" (47).  This was such a peaceful and proud way to end a poem that mainly shows MacNolia's anxiety and longing for John, and her need of his support.  So, this last sentence is like the resolution to those long nine months she spent worrying, wondering if she would lose John forever and if he would abandon her and their son.  I also love how each little phrase is separated by a comma, adding not only emphasis but also allowing the whole image to build on top of one another and become more elaborate.  This idea that a man's cry never changes led me to think of the poem "John Montiere answer to question three" when he describes the first time he hears his son.  If a man's cry never changes, then his cry is the same in adulthood as it was when he was born, which John describes as a "passionate" song.  He remembers, "His voice is like a gust of wind throwing a man's head back or, like a wind whispering through a woman's hair" (45).  Their son's first cry is as powerful and in your face as the strongest gusts, but also stirs the same depth of emotion as a caressing breeze.  MacNolia then sees this in both John and Darrell at his baptism.  Like the first hint of spring brings winds powerful enough to thaw the frozen world after winter, it also follows with a gentle breeze that is fresh, crisp, and hopeful, soothing to the heart.  By seeing John cry especially proves to MacNolia that maybe the rough time in their marriage is over.  Seeing his empathy and love for their son calms MacNolia after she has been worrying for so long. 

A Kitchen Built for One

A line that stuck out to me was in the poem "John Montiere answer to question two" when he said "a kitchen built for one butt to fit in;". This quote perfectly captured how their family functioned to me, if you would call it functioning at all. The kitchen or dining room is usually the place of unity in the family. In movies and TV shows it's the place where a parent cooks while children scurry about to set the table or just to simply get in the way. It's always a place of bonding but in John's family, they lacked that core value. The entire poem explained his father's anger and the tension it caused in the household but usually in situations where one family member alienates themselves because of their anger, the rest of the family sticks together. But this line proved that in John's family it was everybody for themselves.

The Good and The Bad

 

".... red velvet cake; pecan pie; 'Bitch, I said come here''

John remembers the 'red velvet cake' of his childhood. He remembers the pecan pie and the fireflies. He remembers how good he was at playground games. Scattered throughout the pleasant memories he shares, though, are the exact opposite - the memories that many people would hope to forget 

The stark contrast of the memories and the non-existent transitions between them makes me feel as though John sees no distinction. He speaks with a nonchalance that at first made me feel bad for him - I can't imagine what it was like growing up with "Papa peeing down from the tops of the stairs."

I realized however, that even though John Montiere's experience might be an extreme example, everyone's life is inconsistent. I wonder if John is maybe just letting us know that although the good can't overpower the bad, the bad can't overpower the good either. The good memories and the bad memories . . . they're all just part of who we are.

'I said I ain't drunk'; how good I used to be at kickball, free frog, and tetherball"

 

Red Bail Express

Red Bail Express is a poem on page 34 of MacNolia and it is one we did not focus on in class --  or at least, not yet. I really just happened to read this one on my own but I think I like it better than some of the other ones we have read. I believe it is from John's perspective and tells about the time when he was in World War II. I find the literal side of the poem really interesting and very important to the rest of the story because, for me, it changes the way I thought about John before. I think it adds depth to him. I know he had his own personal struggles at home with MacNolia and growing up, but this one is part of what makes him an adult with more wisdom because he has seen more of the world and the horrible things in it. I doubt he returned unscathed.  With all the things I have learned about the story's characters so far, I am not sure what to make of them but hope to learn more as we contiue to read. 

Your Assignment: Music Poetry

For this week's blogging assignment, introduce and analyze a song you are willing to defend as poetry.

Wondering what makes a song poetry?  Well, consider Perrine's definition, but also see below for what you should be discussing about the song.  Because we are talking about poetic language, we are focusing on songs with lyrics.

Your post should have the following:

• an introduction to the song: the "title" of the song, the artist, and the album
• provide any additional context, only if necessary (for example, is the song part of an album-length narrative -- a "concept album"?)
• link the title of the song to the lyrics (for example, "Used Cars").  Do not just dump the entire web address into your post
• state the "what" -- the central idea or theme of the song-poem.  If the song expresses a complete theme, then write it out as a complete statement.  If the song is not constructing such a deliberate message, discuss its purpose, keeping in mind the speaker, audience and occasion – and what experience it might be broadening and/or deepening.
• discuss the "how" -- describe in detail three uses of poetic language that the songwriter employs to get across that idea or theme. Remember, you are not just pointing out where a literary technique appears in the song -- you need to talk about how the songwriter uses it to enhance the meaning of the song. And you must say more than – “The imagery makes me really picture the scene” or “The simile makes me understand things better.” Consider the idea or theme and discuss how the lines fit into it. Uses of rhythm and rhyme do not count for this exercise – but feel free to discuss them. Also, very general techniques such as repetition or use of details also do not count.
• Quote liberally from the song when showing examples of poetic language, but do not dump a huge chunk of lyrics into your post.  Remember, when quoting poetry, you have two options: make it a blockquote, no matter how few lines, or integrate the quote into a paragraph but uses dashes/to indicate line breaks.

The Battle

The novel is always better than the film. First of all, books have way more detail. It provides a much better description of characters, settings, and events. Also, sometimes when people see a movie, they come out wondering why certain people were cast or why certain scenes are the way they are. One example is when people found out that Taylor Swift was going to be in the movie version of Les Mis.

Movies take away your ability to use your imagination. When you read a book you create everything in your head. With movies, it creates the images for you. Sometimes things may not turn out the way you thought they looked. This shows that books are always superior to the movies.

Books or Films

Some of the highest grossing films of all time are based on novels such as Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings series. Most of them have even better reviews from critics. Personally, I believe that films take away the ability to use your imagination because you are seeing the director's interpretation of the novel. The director's interpretation could tamper with your opinion on the novel and confuse viewers because they have the power to change things and adapt them onto film. For instance, the movie,"Forest Gump" is based off of Winston Groom's novel and barely follows the basic storyline.

Films try to mimic the diction formed in novels and make it more interesting. However, some films such as The Scarlet Letter and As You Like It, failed miserably to do so because they are performed poorly and with an awkward interpretation by the director which takes away the color of the film produced by the diction.

Watching films also are not as challenging for the brain because in books you have to pay attention closely to the details of words while in films, a look or a gesture could give a way the ending to it and viewer's like me will lose interest. This will happen because we like a challenge.

The Protruding Nail Gets Hammered- A Reflection on Individuality

Throughout this semesters reading, I (and, evidently, my peers) have noticed a strong theme of individuality in each of the texts.

However, I feel like you can interpret this individuality in two ways, strange as that may seem. Each of the strong characters of our readings, prime examples being MacNolia, Hester, Douglass, and Holden, all seem to both benefit from, and be absolutely destroyed by, their individuality.

Hester, who is able to grow stronger under the weight of the blazing "A" and the scathing eyes of the village, is also worn down by the very existence of Pearl, and by Dimmesdale's untimely end. She retreats back into the edge of the forest, the most distant possible place while still being "inside" the town. Hester is able to assert her individuality, but it leaves her old, weary, and alone.

MacNolia was able to express her originality by being a highly intelligent black child, and an intelligent, strong, and capable black woman. However, by standing out, she draws the fear, disregard, and hate of her racist world. 

Douglass is much like MacNolia, a brilliant black individual with an insatiable thirst to gain a higher education, and to be free. But though he had proven himself to some Northern abolitionists, he still causes fear and anger to strike deep into the hearts of Southern slave owners. No one really knows what to do with a slave, former or otherwise, who can think for himself. He becomes an oddity.

Holden, whose brash and oftentimes irritating personality isolates him from his peers, is certainly a unique individual. His life views are so different from those of everyone around him, and he seems to simply slip through life without a set destination. But this also means that he has virtually no one and nothing he loves, and almost no one or anything to love him in return.

So I wonder- is being an individual such a good thing after all, when it often times seems to be tainted with loneliness and isolation? Should we follow the American ideal that individuality is the thing to strive for?

What about the Asian idea that interdependence is the way to go? That individuals are to be contained is the common way of thinking, and there are two sayings which translate this sentiment well: "The Protruding nail gets hammered", and "The Crying bird gets Shot".

So, which is truly better? A unique lifestyle, no matter how lonely or isolated you are? Or is it best to keep your head down and work with the group to a goal which benefits everyone?

Criticism... will it ever end?

All of the books weve read this semester have been criticisms of America at some point in history: The Scarlet Letter brought light upon fallacies in Puritan society, The Crucible showed us the flaws in Puritan society and during the Red Scare,  Frederick Douglass exposed us to the reality of slavery and racism before the Civil War, Huckleberry Finn poked fun at the ignorance of uneducated racists, The Catcher in the Rye emphasized the "cheesy-ness" of the 1900s, and MacNolia slapped us in the face with a real look at racism in America through the eyes of a black girl growing older. That's quite a list there, and I'd say weve been taken through a pretty good chunk of American cultural history just through reading all of these novels.

Reading all of this cultural criticism and satire got me thinking about the flaws of today's society. I know we're not perfect - America is full of capitalists, elitists, and racists, just to name a few. We might not be as religiously oppressive as the Puritans, but there are still religious battles fought today, sometimes violent ones. We abolished slavery and experienced the Civil Rights movement, but that doesn't mean that race isn't an issue, and it certainly doesn't mean that other types of oppression don't exist today. While we've been reading about imperfections in American culture of the past, we should also stop to realize all of the imperfections in today's world.

This is why I truly hope that future writers will write about us, that in a hundred years English classes will be reading about the flaws in our culture, just as we are doing right now. Our world is not perfect, and it most likely never will be. Criticism in the form of literature should last as long as this world does to open humanity's eyes to the mistakes of their ancestors and make future generations analyze the flaws in their own lives.